


Dandelion in the Spring

by renjunismymotivation



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Chatting & Messaging, Friendship, Light Angst, M/M, Male Friendship, Medical Student Huang Ren Jun, Mentions of COVID-19, Minor Character Death, Quarantine, Sad Na Jaemin, Soft Huang Ren Jun, Spring, Strangers, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2020-12-17
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:27:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28123851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/renjunismymotivation/pseuds/renjunismymotivation
Summary: It starts with an intriguing question from an unknown number.“If I end my life today, do you think I’ll regret it?”---In which Renjun helps Jaemin to get through his difficult phase in life.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Na Jaemin
Comments: 3
Kudos: 60





	Dandelion in the Spring

It starts with an intriguing question from an unknown number.

“If I end my life today, do you think I’ll regret it?”

Renjun’s heart skips a beat or two. He clicks on the reply button in a blink of an eye, but his mind freezes when the keyboard appears. The truth is, he doesn’t know what kind of response he should type.

Should he reply with a big yes?

Should he forbid the person from doing so?

Should he tell the person to dial the suicide hotline?

A part of Renjun is telling him to delete the sudden message from a complete stranger and put his phone away. It’ll be easier to ignore it rather than replying with a wrong response and ending up taking that person’s life unintentionally. Either way, whether he replies the message or not, he can still be blamed if the person ever commits suicide.

Renjun lets out a heavy sigh. 

The odds of him typing the wrong reply are high, but it’s much better than pretending he never received the message. After all, it’s quarantine time, and he doesn’t have anything better to do anyway, besides studying. At least he can tell them – police officers, family members, friends, whoever they are – he has tried, if anything happens to him.

Renjun rests his elbows on the study table, mind still processing what kind of words does the person need at times of confusion like this.

“Definitely…” He mouths out his reply, fingers typing out the words. “You’ll regret it because you’ll miss the chance to get to know me.” 

A light reply might be able to cheer that person up.

He sends the message and in a matter of seconds, the screen of his phone lights up as a new message comes in. It is as if the person is waiting for his response the whole time.

“Really? Then, I should learn about you first while I’m still alive.”

Renjun’s lips form a small smile. He sees a slight spark of hopes in the reply, and he hopes he’s right.

“It’ll take years for you to learn about me. Are you up for that?”

“I can do it in a shorter time. Try me.” 

The person on the other side of the line seems to be confident about it. 

Renjun finds it quite funny, honestly, because he has been living his life for 21 years, yet he still doesn’t really know about himself.

“Okay,” Renjun breathes, “what kind of information am I going to disclose to this stranger?”

After contemplating whether he should tell the person his real name or not, his eyes fall on the scattered notes on the table. There, on the bottom of his notes about antibiotics, is a small yellow sticky note of a rectangular shape. The sloppy handwriting in blue ink reads “You’ll do great in the exam. After all, you’re a dandelion in the spring.” 

He introduces himself as Spring, as in the season. 

The person doesn’t question Renjun’s choice of nickname as he tells his real name. 

“Na Jaemin.”

He insists to let Renjun know his name so that if he somehow gets mentioned in the news, the Chinese will know they’re referring to him.

Renjun decides to ignore the underlying message as he jokingly replies that even if he gets his writings published by the papers, Jaemin still won’t be able to recognize him.

“So, you write?” 

The simple question brings so much excitement that Renjun can feel adrenaline rushing throughout his whole body. Before he can be clear about him being a medical student who fancy writing, Jaemin sends him another message.

“You can write about me.”

It is more of a suggestion, rather than an order, and Renjun is glad to take the recommendation.

“Now that I have to learn about you, I’m pretty sure it’ll take half a decade for us to know each other.” Renjun presses the ‘send’ button after adding a sticking-out-tongue emoji at the back of the sentence. “Are you up for that, too?”

With a single yes, Na Jaemin becomes the highlight of his upcoming days during the quarantine.

\---

It doesn’t take Jaemin long to open up with Renjun. 

Jaemin turns out to be a full-time photographer who has a gallery of his own. 

Renjun has heard of him before, he realizes, when the Korean reveals his private Instagram account, where he shares some of his magnificent arts and achievements with his closest friends. The smooth gradient of his Instagram feed leaves Renjun in awe, but what catches his attention the most is the fact that most of the pictures are of flowers.

“You like flowers?” Renjun asks, typing out the question.

Jaemin replies the message in an instant, stating that the word ‘like’ is an understatement. He loves flowers. He is attracted to their radiant colours, and how they have the ability to light up his life for the whole 25 years of him living this dull world.

It hits Renjun, in a way, to question his intentions when he first texted him with the sudden question a week ago. But his mind quickly pushes the thought away, afraid to ask such sensitive topics to this recovering man. 

Renjun scrolls his feed again, and bright yellow petals that surround a blossoming rose captivate him.

“Dandelions are pretty, don’t you think? I love them the most.”

Jaemin is quite surprised at his statement, seeing that he replies with a full caps lock, “THE WEEDS?!” Another message comes in as he adds, “Your preferences are interesting, Spring.”

Renjun lets out a trail of chuckles as he replies, “Look beyond.” His gaze shifts to the photograph of dandelions on his bed frame. The petals look like a lion’s teeth. They are no more beautiful than the roses, but the symbolisations they hold within them are incomparable.

“Dandelions, in the language of flowers, reflect the ability to rise above life’s challenges. They survive despite having to compete with the other weeds on the ground. They survive despite being stepped on by humans. They are a survivor.” Renjun presses the ‘send’ button before he continues, “And Jaemin… You are, too. You’re a survivor, just like the dandelions. And you’ll be fine.”

There is a long moment of silence.

Jaemin doesn’t reply as fast as he usually does, and it scares Renjun.

Maybe he has stepped over the line.

“If you feel insulted, I am deeply sorry.” Renjun struggles to type with his trembling hands. Before he gets to send the message, his phone vibrates vigorously. It is a call from Jaemin. Hesitating, he clicks the green button and puts the phone to his left ear. His eyes shut, lips pressed against each other, forming a thin line. Truth is, he’s scared of whatever Jaemin is about to say.

“Spring…” Low, his voice is. “Do you really think I’m a survivor?” The question is laced with a hint of sorrow, followed by a sniff, as if he is holding back his tears.

Renjun pauses.

“I do,” he whispers softly. “Don’t you think so?”

The man on the other side of the line pauses. The sniffs get louder with each passing second.

“I’m a failure…” he confesses. 

Renjun can feel the pain throbbing in his heart as Jaemin continues, “I pursued my dreams to become a well-known photographer without minding my mother’s wish to see me as a doctor.” He takes a deep breath. “The thing is, I got accepted into medical school. But I was selfish. I only thought about myself. So, I ran away.” He pauses. The silence wraps around them for a long minute before he whispers, “I lost my mother to Covid-19 last week.”

Renjun’s heart breaks.

“If I have just listened to her and become a doctor, I might be able to save her.” He tries to gulp the sobs away, but they only become louder.

Renjun’s grip on the phone tightens. Hot crystals well in his eyes as he softly calls Jaemin’s name. “Jaemin…” he holds back his shaking voice. “You’re a survivor.” Tears finally roll down his cheeks but he quickly wipes them away with the hem of his sleeve. “You’re a survivor, and I’m proud of you.”

He doesn’t reply.

“Do you know that dandelions have a strong connection to the Sun?” Renjun props himself up from his bed and takes a long glance on the window. The garden is painted by the colourful petals of the bougainvillea and violets, as they dance according to the melody of the spring breeze. The ground is carpeted with green, yellow and a pinch white petal of dandelions under the bright sunlight. “They light up people’s lives with their blinding yellow petals… Just like you.” Renjun’s lips form a small smile. “You radiate my life when I feel like my quarantine days are dull.”

The sobs from the other side of the line tune down.

Jaemin sighs.

“You’re going to thrive, just like the dandelions.” Renjun softens down his tone, “I’ll be here for you, whenever you need me. I can be your person. I’ll help you rise above life’s challenges.” His eyes fall on the swaying petals of the violets. “Let me be the spring to your dandelions.”

After a long pause, Jaemin finally replies, “You’re a beautiful coincidence, Spring. Thank you.”

It is not a coincidence. Out of all random numbers he could have texted, he picked Renjun’s. It is not a coincidence. It is already written in the sky.

“I’m glad I texted the right person,” he whispers. “Your words radiate such comforting warmth despite us being strangers. That is how you simply suit the name Spring.” He takes a deep breath and continues, “And yes, please, I’d like to be a dandelion in the spring.”

Dandelions in the spring mean rebirth.

Perhaps it is fated that Renjun will be the one to help him free himself from the metal chain that blocks radiance from shining him from within.

“Promise me you will thrive to survive.” Renjun breathes, "just like the dandelions..."

“I promise.”

With the two words, Jaemin shows how much of a survivor he is. He reached out to a stranger for help – what a fighter! He may be scarred by his past decisions, but he is willing to face them now, slowly but surely.

\---

Renjun writes this story in hopes that people can learn from Jaemin. He hopes Jaemin’s will to thrive will inspire everyone to do so, too. 

Reach out to someone if you’re in need. The right person will definitely help you. 

Renjun keeps his promise.

Now, Jaemin has to keep his.

**Author's Note:**

> Comments and kudos are very much appreciated <3


End file.
